Real Estate and The Adventures of Parenthood

Episode 51 - "Special Edition" Girl Why!

November 30, 2022 Cindy Presgraves Season 1 Episode 51
Episode 51 - "Special Edition" Girl Why!
Real Estate and The Adventures of Parenthood
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Real Estate and The Adventures of Parenthood
Episode 51 - "Special Edition" Girl Why!
Nov 30, 2022 Season 1 Episode 51
Cindy Presgraves

Modern dating and everything else. Learning how dating is in 2022.

Cindy's Realty Group by eXp Realty
Cindy Presgraves REALTOR®
678-650-1425
888-959-9461 ext: 1323
www.CindysRealtyGroup.com

Questions:
Email: Cindy@cindysrealtygroup.com

Instagram: Cindys_Realty_Group
TikTok: CindyPresgraves
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/CindyRealtyG...

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Start for FREE

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Start for FREE

Support the Show.

How to become a Realtor? Read my book:
https://a.co/d/3Y91jFa

Audible:
https://www.audible.com/pd/B0BB53FDFB/?source_code=AUDFPWS0223189MWT-BK-ACX0-318935&ref=acx_bty_BK_ACX0_318935_rh_us

Looking to Join my team send me an email:
Cindy@cindysrealtygroup.com

Instagram
Https://www.instagram.com/cindy_presgraves

Titkok:
https://www.tiktok.com/@cindypresgraves

LinkedIn:
https://www.linkedin.com/in/cindypresgraves/


Show Notes Transcript

Modern dating and everything else. Learning how dating is in 2022.

Cindy's Realty Group by eXp Realty
Cindy Presgraves REALTOR®
678-650-1425
888-959-9461 ext: 1323
www.CindysRealtyGroup.com

Questions:
Email: Cindy@cindysrealtygroup.com

Instagram: Cindys_Realty_Group
TikTok: CindyPresgraves
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/CindyRealtyG...

Buzzsprout - Let's get your podcast launched! 
Start for FREE

Buzzsprout - Let's get your podcast launched! 
Start for FREE

Support the Show.

How to become a Realtor? Read my book:
https://a.co/d/3Y91jFa

Audible:
https://www.audible.com/pd/B0BB53FDFB/?source_code=AUDFPWS0223189MWT-BK-ACX0-318935&ref=acx_bty_BK_ACX0_318935_rh_us

Looking to Join my team send me an email:
Cindy@cindysrealtygroup.com

Instagram
Https://www.instagram.com/cindy_presgraves

Titkok:
https://www.tiktok.com/@cindypresgraves

LinkedIn:
https://www.linkedin.com/in/cindypresgraves/


Cindy:

All right people this is Dear Baddies with Nicole and Cindy, boyfriend bitches and everything in between. And now I'm going to have Nicole!

Nicole:

Go. Hi, everyone. I'm Nicole, Nicole Fagan, Nicole AF. As some of you know me on Facebook, and I am so excited about this podcast. And Cindy, I'm so excited to do this with you. You are amazing. So I'm ready to dig in and get started. So first topic of conversation. This episode is called girl. Why? So why did we create this? Why are we calling you baddies? Because you are all bad ass Bitches. So let's just get right down to it. Storytime. We have already time. Story time. So I'm sure a lot of you know, myself from the Facebook group. are we sharing boyfriends? So if we want to fast forward, or I'm sorry, if we want to rewind a year, I started this Facebook group called are we sharing boyfriends. And it came because we three other girls all dated the exact same guy. And I'm sure that you're wondering, how did you not know? Well, we didn't know he was really, really good. And he's really fucking good. So he was dating me, he he said, let me go take my mom to her chemo treatments, when he was really going to someone else's house. So this dumbass decided to play three of us, four of us, really. So we found out. We all dumped in and moved on with our lives. But I think that that was more of like, the icing on the cake. Instead of you know, here's a bad guy. Like, let me talk shit about him. Now, this was the icing on the cake. So hence the are we sharing boyfriend. So I feel like it's more of like a Yelp review for men and Atlanta. Because as we all know, dating in Atlanta is a crapshoot, to say the very least, what do you agree?

Cindy:

Um, I basically I can say, I just started the dating scene, and I'm gonna let you finish your story. And then I'm gonna go with mine.

Nicole:

Yeah, for sure. So also back to the Facebook group. So I never, never saw it blowing up to I think we've got around 5000 girls in the group now. And the premise is, you know, let's post a picture of said man that, you know, maybe they're about to go on a date with they met them on a dating app, or watch out for this guy because he is a piece of trash. So you know, we we obviously have to moderate and make sure that, you know, we're not using any personal identifying information or any PII or anything like that. But you know, it's, it's become this kind of like, I don't know, movement, to say the least, you know, it's, I've made a ton of girlfriends. And on Sunday, I'm sure that you've met some girls out of the group too, and invited some of your friends to be in there. And it's just, we've all just become badass bitches, you know, so hence the name daddy. So if I ever address anybody in the group, it's Hey, baddies. You know, and always put like a, like a queen, emoji, and a heart just to know, just to let you know, like, you're a badass. And whatever you're going through during the day, you can tackle this, you've got this, and we're gonna move on.

Cindy:

So I can I completely agree with you. And that's the thing is just like, this group has been very empowering a same time being aware of what are you actually dating? And it's hilarious. I mean, if when you go into these into these profiles, it's just like, seriously, this is the type of line that they're using. What he says he's single, but what is no way? I mean, is this really a profile? I mean, yeah, and I'm not saying this is only men. I mean, I can tell you, this is also women. So we want to actually get into gender neutral, just because we're not only women are being affected by men are also being affected on this.

Nicole:

So yeah, there's a line of communication, you know, like, it takes two to tango. So it's not it's not just men, it's women to and I think it's but like with this podcast, I think, you know, this is going to be like our platform to, to really, I guess emphasize that point. And, you know, bring that back home and focus on ourselves and what we can do better and you know, what we can change and, and, you know, love ourselves at the end of the day, because we are the price.

Cindy:

But not only that, keep in mind that you don't have to be in a relationship to be happy. You know, and it's like this podcast is going to be teaching you on what are the things you should actually focus as a person. Okay, you're going through a heartbreak. And what can I do? You know, oh my gosh, you know what this person is asking me to for space, but what does that really mean? I mean, it's just like, going on dates are hot. You even dig in the 2020 twos. I mean, it's either swipe left or swipe right. Like I went out. And he's like, um, like, so what caught your attention? Oh, I just swiped.

Nicole:

Yeah, so I mean, it does seem like it's, it's almost like who it's like a competition, like who looks the best, but it's not, you know, looks are gonna fade but that personality is still going to be there and you're growing and changing and evolving. And you know, weight can be gained or weight can be lost. So I mean, I think that's probably a good topic of conversation in the future for future episodes episodes. So but I would, I would love to hear your story as to why you wanted to do this podcast.

Cindy:

So I basically so I'm off. I'm an author. I'm a motivator, I inspire people and like, so I wrote a book about like, inspiring people and motivating and keeping moving forward. So the reason I wanted to do this podcast is because I noticed that a lot of women in a lot of men fell fall for the same trap. And I'm like, how do we actually get the word out there? How can we actually help other people empower them? How can like, I've been single for four years. I mean, I was, I've been separated for over four years, divorce two years, single two years. And I started like, I never dated in the state of Georgia, just because, you know, I work. I'm a single mom. And I'm like, you know, what, why would I date? Let me just start exploring. And I met Mr. bacon bacon. I love The Name. So the name bacon bacon, let's put it that way. I started talking to him. He seemed like a great guy, March. He's in the guard and all that. And, you know, he's like, Oh, no, you know what, we're just talking him and I. And I'm like, where? Where's this coin? He kept on saying, just me. I'm just focused on myself. Happens to be That a few days ago, he's like, Oh, no, I just want space. And like, Why does he want space? I mean, I mean, there's nothing wrong. I mean, anyways, happens to be that Mr. bacon bacon is actually seeing some other girl and not only one or two other girls, and I'm like, why?

Nicole:

And you have the exclusive. Like, we're exclusive. We're not seeing other people conversation.

Cindy:

Yes, we did. And I didn't like I didn't understand like, why I mean, and he's like, I just need a space because he had a crazy ex girlfriend. And I'm, like, interesting. And I fell for that. Because he said, he read the Bible and, and he's a really good guy. Don't ever fall for that. Ladies. Don't, don't don't. And I, I'm into extreme sports. So I started focusing more on myself. I fly planes, I jump out of planes. I travel a lot. And I was like, Okay, interesting. And all sudden, like, he texted me last week. And he's like, Well, I'm going back to work and all that. And I'm like, What do you want? I mean, do you want more space? Do you need more time? Or what are we going to do? He's like, any more space, give me give me a few more weeks, happens to be that he's actually seen this girl from Columbus, Georgia, and I'm like, What in the world? And I'm like, You know what? And this has taught me like, you know what? Their signs their red flags completely. And I know we have an episode that is common to that. Like, if a guy gives you excuses, walk away. If a guy gives you tells you you know what I'm in between walk away. If a guy tells you just me walk away, if a guy gives you so many excuses, walk away. If a guy tells you, I want to be you, I want to be with you. I want to see you. You stay. Give them that chance. If that guy makes the extra effort in contacts you and it's following up with you consistency is so important. In that is why I am here with Nicole today. I want to help you guys continue moving forward, not staying stuck. I mean, it's about like how to get out of toxic relationships. Look, we're going to be talking about everything. And not only that, we're going to be bringing on coaches everything and I want you guys to enjoy this. We want you guys to learn from us. We we want to learn from you. This is why we have our email address there too. So like, like this morning, I texted you right Nicole about this guy? And I'm gonna read the text message.

Nicole:

Please do because that this just further cements that it is not just women like women. I mean, of course I'm woman. I'm bias right? So I'm going to I'm going to assume that you know that it only happens to us. But that's just not true. You know, it happens to the men too. And it's sad. But yeah, please read the text. Yeah. Okay,

Cindy:

so this is this is like my friend, he's 24 years old. Yes, I have younger friends than me, by the way. Hey, you never know. Okay, so this is from my friend, he texted me this morning. He's like, I'm sorry, it took me. This is from his, from this girl that he's been like, in love with and is so and he's so sweet. And it's always giving. I'm sorry, it took me all day to respond. But I had to truly take the time to soak it soak that in laughing out loud. I appreciate you being open with me and making things clear. Like I told you a little bit ago, I'm not ready for anything just yet. And I know you understand that. But believe the day I feel, but believe the day I feel like I am ready again. I'll have you in mind at the moment. I just need space and time to myself.

Nicole:

You know, higher in that I'm hearing bullshit bullshit bullshit

Cindy:

in town to myself, and I need to enjoy that. I however, do enjoy the time, time we spend together as well. And also have that in mind.

Nicole:

That poor guy, like, I'm sure he's sitting there thinking like, what did I do? You know? And we would be doing the exact same thing. What what did I do to make them not want to hang out with?

Cindy:

When people need space, it's just like, that is a red flag. This is all completely bullshit. It's just like, time for myself. Okay, so if you really want to be with me, I don't want time away from you. Even if I'm upset with you. And no, you need you need to you guys want to grow. You guys communicate? That is how a relationship works. You know what sometimes? Yes, sometimes you need to let them walk away and then come back and cool down. And in this I think I told Nicole is I mean, like, I always looked at long distance relationships because it gave them time to cool down. And we didn't have to be on top of each other anything in me experimenting in dating in state is something new. But this what my friend experience. He's like, sounds familiar, because it's the same bullshit that this bacon making guy gave me and like, I told him, blocked, delete, and move on. That's what I

Nicole:

have. Absolutely. She's not going to come back. She's not going to she's not going to maybe in a year when she wants attention. She'll come back and say, Hey, do you want to hang out? I need attention. And then you know, of course, we'll start the the same old rigmarole that he used to. I mean, I'm not gonna lie, I've sent a text like that before. And I honestly regret it. Because now being in my mid 30s, I wish that I had been more transparent. I wish I had been, I wish I had had the maturity to know, like, this is not appropriate. This is what I should and shouldn't say.

Cindy:

And I told you, it's and this is, like I said, this is basically how can we help you guys? It's not about all the feeding bullshit that we get all the time. Or I need space, or I need time to get over things. Look, if you're broken, you can't fix broken move on there's, that's one of the things other things is just like, Hey, um, when they disappear for hours, or they don't contact you, and oh, another one is Snapchat, I remember was Snapchat and he didn't like he. He didn't like wanted to go through WhatsApp. And now I understand because he didn't want me to keep the conversation.

Nicole:

Exactly, exactly.

Cindy:

I personally use WhatsApp for my family because I have family all over and have friends all over the place. Right? But there's so many things that I have learned as an adult because, okay, I am 37 years old, but I started dating now because I never did as an adult. And you'd be like, what? Yes, because when I started dating Well, no, when I was when I was in college, I met my my first husband in college, and him and I were in ROTC. Then I met my ex husband, my second ex husband, I met him I was his boss. And, you know, that was easy for me because it was what Yeah.

Nicole:

I think that's how it should be. It should be organic. And I feel like a lot of times these dating apps, it's it's very forced, you know, so, but like I said earlier, it's it's kind of, you know, it's a competition like Who's the prettiest? Like let me see who who's the most pretty. I said that completely wrong. Who is the prettiest Girl, then I can go on a date with and potentially have my deck stuck. You know, I don't know, I don't know if dating apps work to be quite honest with you. And I think I'm looking forward to like the dating coaches that we're going to have on the show. Because I have a lot of questions for a lot.

Cindy:

I have like, in my case, I think that dating apps, it's just like, you shouldn't get on a dating app as just like, Oh, I'm going to do this for someone to date this person. No, you should get on a dating app on building relationships, because you can't be focused on and this is like, I was talking to this guy, and we'll have him on the show. He's like, he's impatient. He wants someone and I told them, Look, you got to be patient, because that right person is going to come at the right time. We have to go through circumstances and, and things in life to make us a better person. And sometimes, you know what? This is I had an older couple, and they were one of my clients. And after 45 years there were there were high school sweethearts. And after 45 years, they reunite and they got married.

Nicole:

Oh, that's amazing. And it's

Cindy:

just like yellow. JLo. Think about

Nicole:

it. Oh, yeah. JLo Ben Affleck. Yeah.

Cindy:

It took them 20 years. 20 years to come back together.

Nicole:

Yeah. Yeah. My grandparents were like that, too. They were highschool sweethearts. He went off to World War Two, she, I think she had four kids, he had two. And then they both were divorced, got back together had my dad. And then my dad had me. So it's an I mean, they love each other. Like, I want a love like that, you know? Because that was, I mean, it was so pure. And I mean, you could just feel the love. Like when you walked into their house, it was it was amazing.

Cindy:

And that's what I want to because it's just like nowadays is till death do as a part until the divorce was apart. Which one is it?

Nicole:

Yeah, but you know what, you know, because I've always heard I've had a lot of guys in the past from dating apps, particularly say, you know, I don't want to date anyone that's been married. I don't want to date anyone that has children. But you know what, we're mid 30s. So once you cross that 30 threshold, you're gonna have to date someone that has potentially had a marriage or potentially has kids. There's not a lot of single kid lists, people out there. But I think I don't think that that makes us damaged goods or anything. Because I know you and I both have been through a divorce. I think it's more of, we recognize that we were not happy, and we got the fuck out. Because we knew that we deserve to be happy.

Cindy:

And I totally agree with you. Because let's say for instance, I remember when I was little, and I know this is throwing my mom under the bus. And my mom would always tell me for the podcast that I won't maybe my mom will say, Never get divorced, never get divorced, never get divorced. And I'm like, and she would say, hey, you know what? Because my aunt got divorced three times. And I'm like, do you want to be unhappy for the rest of your life? Or do you want to freak out, get the balls and grow balls and move on? Because you know what, regardless of what situation you're in, if you're not happy, you have to make yourself happy. You are first, then is the rest. And for that you got to follow up. And if you're not happy, why stay with one person? Why stay with that person? Now? I'm not saying stay with one person, meaning date other people, lots of people or No, no, no, no, no, no. I'm saying why are you in that marriage? Why are you in that relationship? And sometimes we don't see these red flags. It's just like, my, my first ex husband. I didn't want to get married. And I married him because I didn't want to lose his friendship. I made the mistake, but it made me a better person. If I would have not met him and moved to North Dakota, then I would have not, you know, met my ex husband to have my kids.

Nicole:

Yeah. Yeah, I totally agree. I think I don't, you know, I've been through a lot of therapy for with my ex husband because I got married so young. I got married at 22. And then we were married for about 11 years, but I lost my dad to a heart attack about a year before. So the therapy that I received and you know, the different people that I saw are correlating me marrying an older man. He was 12 years older. To me losing my father at such a young age. I was 20 when he died. So you know, I was trying to like substitute an older man in that position. So if I could go back and redo it I 100% would but then again I don't know if I would I wouldn't have my daughter you know so it's it's it's a tough it's a struggle but at the same time, like I wasn't happy I got out I found myself worth found my passions, and I cannot I can't wait to tell every like to tell you guys more about like my Story and, and I've only been in the dating world again for I guess three years. So it's an it's been a roller coaster? For sure. Just say the bare minimum.

Cindy:

I'm not looking forward to it. I've been the dating world, two weeks, I guess. I mean, I'm on and off dating apps. And I'm like, this is just, I mean, do I even want to go through this? Because I mean, it's just like, you talk to a guy, they're consistent. I mean, do I really want to go on? And then the nerve wracking part is meeting them in person? But like, do I really want to meet this person? Am I I mean, or do I just treat treat as a business transaction? And me as a realtor, I treat everything as a business transaction. And it's just like, okay, so he hasn't called me in 24 to 48 hours. I mean, he's not interested in move forward. You're he's been a little bit he's busy with life and all that, or what is it? Or I have guys that are texting me that are needy, or you haven't texted me today? You forgot about? Yeah, what we, um, I have a life too.

Nicole:

Exactly. I know, there needs to be some sort of happy medium. And I feel like, once we talk to like the dating coaches, and all the people that we have lined up, I feel like by the, you know, at least by the sixth episode, we should have a really good grasp on. You know, what? I would hope so.

Cindy:

So, I mean, there's so much to learn, though, because I also like, I went through a lot of therapy. Look, I went through a psychologist, psychiatrists, counselor, I mean, I even went through hypnotherapy. But that's a totally different subject and conversation completely. And spiritual retreats, too. But it's about how was your childhood? When you go to date on dates? How was your childhood? Did they have any type of abusive household? Where they what, what, what, what happened during that time? Because whatever happened during their childhood is going to affect their relationship?

Nicole:

Oh, of course. Yeah.

Cindy:

How do they treat their mom, their siblings? Are they close to their family or not?

Nicole:

Do they have friends? How, how big is their friend circle? Are they going on bachelor trips every other weekend? You know, like, those things that I think are super important, but it's also a red flag, you know, if they don't have any friends, but it's a red flag for females too. Do you not have any male friends? Do you not have any female friends? I always think it's uh, even when I'm looking for friends or friendships with other females? Do you have a lot of girlfriends? Are most of your friends guys? Are they? Are you trying to get attention from them? You know, it's because I've had to, you know, kind of, I guess I don't want to say pump up. But like, I've had to find new friends just through, you know, marriage, giving birth, you know, getting divorce. So like, all those friends change? And that's something I look for, like in friendships like, Is this person a genuine person? So I can't have? I'm sure you're the same way. I can't have fake friendships. You know, if it's just surface level. I like if it doesn't, what do you bring into the table? I guess. But I'd like to have like, deeper conversations than just like, you know, oh, my God, this person is so cute. Yeah.

Cindy:

I totally agree with you with that, too. I mean, you gotta look at. Okay, so even with friendship with anything is, are we compatible? Like Nicole and I, we talk, what is it? What over an hour? And we're like, okay, you have to do so. So, I mean, we hit it off off the bat. But are you doing the same thing with relationships? When people meet? Are they meeting all your expectations? are they what are they? What are their ambitions? What are their goals like they can make and he didn't have a mission. All he wanted to do was pay his goal was to pay off his house. I mean, nothing wrong with that. But then again,

Nicole:

a great goal.

Cindy:

Yes, but then again, it's just like, you're paying off your house. But instead of doing that, why don't you go ahead and buy different properties to grow your wealth? No, I don't do that. Because I don't I just get what I can actually afford. Now. That is a poor mindset. And I can completely talk about different things that is does not align with me. And I'm glad that they can make it didn't work with me because he was not for me.

Nicole:

I just think back. Yeah. If you think back on the entire relationship that you had with Megan bacon, what do you think your very first red flag was? When he started talking to him? Was it Snapchat? Was it what do you think it was?

Cindy:

Snapchat? Yeah. Snapchat, because it was like, I mean, yes, he would answer super fast, super fast, super fast all the time. We talked for five almost five months, every single day all day long. Yeah. And he I mean, he was sending snaps he would I mean, talk to me all this, and then you don't want to meet me what's going on? Why couldn't you be forward with me? Or didn't you have enough balls? But I think it was the whole aspect that happened was when we met in person. And I had asked them like, hey, you know, what? How much do you make? Because he was actually driving me a little bit nuts with, Oh, that's too expensive. Like we were talking about protein bars that are like 1212 for $30. Like the best protein bars. And he's like, he told me him the amount and we're sitting down at this restaurant. And he was like, he asked me, and then that was like, that's what actually turned him like away completely.

Nicole:

You got the Yeah, I hate that. I know, once you get the egg, you never come back from. I mean, it could be like the smallest little thing. I think that would probably turn anybody off. Like I don't, I wouldn't want to tell anyone how much money I made. That's not anybody's business. You know, that's my business. But was there anything else that you saw, that was a pretty big red flag?

Cindy:

I would say that. He didn't, he wanted to stay in the same place. He wanted to stay in Macon close to his family. And don't get me wrong. That's a great idea. But someone that wants to evolve, wants to move up. And then like, what not having goals? That was my first one than not having goals? Like, how do you why do you have a list for the for your future? Wife? What are you looking at a person just a wife? Okay, so what else are you looking for? In? I'm very goal oriented when I'm telling you I do something? Well, yeah, I will do it. I mean, I don't. And that was one of them. The other one was like ambition, like, what do you want in life do you want? He's like, I just want to retire. But that's like, 30 years.

Nicole:

What a long ways away, what are you going to do in the interim?

Cindy:

in me, and personally, I'm like, I'm retiring in five years. I'm like, Sia, you like to travel? Yeah, I'm not a big traveler. That's another one. It's like, like looking into the situation. And I tell you guys, all of you guys, when you guys are meeting someone, make sure that you're not settling down, that, that everything aligns with you, like I work out all the time. I'm very, very healthy. He eats whatever, I have to take care of my health, completely course. And do you eat Do you cook? What do you like? And there's so many things that we were not compatible at all. So it's just like, Hmm, you know, I love to travel. I mean, yes, I have two little kids. But I'm here one moment, and then I'm over there. You know, it doesn't matter where it is. That I mean, now looking and thinking about it. Really? He was not for me.

Nicole:

No. Well, when do you think you really figured that out? Like, you said that, like your goals that aren't aligned? So when did it I guess when did it kind of like click that maybe he just wasn't the right one.

Cindy:

I think it was like a second or third week. Because I asked questions like that super fast. And I kept on telling him like, I wasn't like interesting, but I think it was like his consistency. And him like, continuously, like being consistent and persistent with me. That's what it caught me completely. Just because I wasn't looking for anything. Honestly, I usually get on dating apps. And I just like, one or two days, and I'm out. This has been the longest time I've been on a dating app. And well, I pay the premium on that. But that's why and yeah, I know, that's when this is the thing, it's just like, he wasn't for me at all, because I wanted to plan I want someone that is going to be able to plan the future with me. If you don't have any plans with me. You can't plan the next weekend or the next few days. Then what are we talking about? Oh, I have to check. I just want to get home. Okay, but if you want to get home and that didn't like, put I can put I put two and two together. But I was like too blind into

Nicole:

like, caught up in the moment. Maybe?

Cindy:

Yes. Caught up in the moment of like, No, I'm just making things up. I'm just like, No. And there's like the signs were there and I didn't see it.

Nicole:

Do you think that with this guy maybe. And I'm just grasping at straws here. But do you think maybe Are you in love with being in love? Is that a possibility?

Cindy:

I'm very hard to fall in love with it. Yeah, there has to be the connection. If there's no connection. I'm not going to give you a time with Dan at all.

Nicole:

Ya know if I'm the same I have to have that initial connection. But you know, I have one story for you. So, last year I went out with this guy could not remember his name and save my life. But it's a J name. And we all know about J names. So we I normally, like I would normally FaceTime, you know, and I don't like to give out my phone number. So it would be over like WhatsApp, or snapchat video, something like that. Because I don't like to give out my number until I've actually met them in person. But um, we FaceTimed or I guess I should say, video chat, now FaceTime, and then we met up, everything was great. On the video chat, everything was great. When we were at the restaurant, we just, you know, had a couple of beers and like some wings or something. And conversation flowed. It was great. And then as soon as we walked out to my car is when he got really, really, really creepy. And I kept thinking like, Okay, where did this go wrong? You know, it was, it was all a sexual talk. It was, like, let me shove my tongue down your throat kind of thing. And I just could not for the life of me think, where did I go wrong. But I think where I went wrong, and this is probably at least over a year ago, maybe last summer or something. But I think where I went wrong was, I think I gave too much information ahead of time. And that maybe made him feel a lot more comfortable with me and than he should have. So it's definitely a learning experience. But I think also at that time, I really wanted it to work. And I'm not sure that I knew that I wanted it to work with him specifically, I just wanted it to work because I was tired of being on dating apps is tired of getting the runaround. And I've learned, I've learned my lesson, for sure on that one. But I totally understand where you're coming from, you know, not seeing the red flags. And I know that there were a lot of red flags with that guy. He was very persistent. very, like, I guess needy in a sense, you know, like, why are we not talking? You know, what, why are you sleeping? Like, you're not talking to me, you're sleeping? You know, it was? It was a little strange. So, yeah, hindsight is always 2020 for sure.

Cindy:

I definitely agree with that. I mean, sometimes it's just like, I've been single for some time. And it's just like, I honestly, that's one of the reasons like, so I send my kids with my parents for the whole summer, right? And that, May, June, July, 1 week of August. And what I do is I travel, I spend time with my family, I do things that I really want to do. And as a mom, you need that me time, especially being a full time single mom. And it's just like, during the time I didn't date anybody I was, I was on my own. I mean, I hang out with friends, I jump out of planes, you know, I, I flew, I flew planes, I mean, I I travel with my with my family when my brothers. I mean, I was me. And sometimes, in order for us not to feel lonely, we have to do things that we can actually fill our social calendar, meaning like, what can we Hey, what are you doing? Hey, Nicole, what are you doing this weekend? Or hey, and it's always good to have friends. And even though a couple of weeks ago, this is after my birthday, which is July. I was like I woke up on a Saturday morning. Like, you know what, I feel like jumping off a plane today.

Nicole:

And that's amazing.

Cindy:

And I was when I got there like, so you're here by yourself? Only me. And what I did was I talked to the other guy, I talk to other people and I like I make fun. I made videos I posted about it. And you know, I had a blast. Even it was with strangers. I had a blast for my birthday I spent in a jungle by myself and I met strangers too. And I spent it with strangers, which is pretty awesome. So it's gonna come down to getting to know the red flags. But what do you really want? Are you really desperately looking for something that you don't that you're going to regret later on? That it's going to? It's going to get you to a heartbreak? Or what really what really is it you know, what is it really?

Nicole:

I think you and I had been through enough of the dating apps and enough of the terrible shitty fuck boy kind of men that I think that we do have grounds to speak on for this but I'm really really looking forward to our interview with the fuck boy with our multiple interviews with the dating coaches. Like I'm stoked for all of that because I think even as as much as we know, I think we can learn icon.

Cindy:

Oh, yes. And then there's one episode and I know we haven't talked about this, but I sent it to you. Oh yeah, that recyclable dig in. posi love it. I love it. Oh, there's gonna be it's gonna be so much fun. We're going to be talking about different things. And any suggestions and anything you guys want to know. Please let us know. I was talking to my guy to the fuck boy. We're going to be actually interviewing him tomorrow. So that episode is gonna be a couple of weeks. But hey, you know what, how to actually date? Or how to actually look at that type of guy that you're actually looking for, you know? Or what are the things that you should actually do in a dating app that you're not doing? Like, I met with him, he's, he's a really good friend of mine. He's, he's rehabilitated. And, and he's like, Okay, I need to look at your Bumble, I need to look at your hands. I need to be in all these apps. Let me let me let me tweak all this. Okay, perfect. You know, you need to put yourself in Atlanta, you need to look in your radius in your area. In now I'm actually learning how to do that. Are they rarefied or not? Or is it catfish? You know, I personally, I don't like texting with because it takes too much time. And I talk too much, honestly. So I like to send my I send videos like theirs. I like Bumble because you can actually send a video and you know what? They can see them? You can they can see you in some of these pictures are like, Have you guys ever seen the realtor pictures? Like from 50 years ago? And there's it and then when you see them? It's like, wow. Inside but makes you feel more comfortable? While you're actually talking to them? Do you want to? Do you really want to go out with them or not? If not just a match? Because they don't have to know anything about you.

Nicole:

Exactly, exactly. I'm so looking forward to this. And also to piggyback right off of what you said is, you know, email us with questions. And you know, you have if you want advice with the people that we're going to interview, email us questions, so we can answer that and, you know, hopefully get you a good answer and one that, you know, you can actually abide by. But we're here to help. And I'm so stoked. Cindy are amazing. If I haven't said that enough to you today.

Cindy:

Welcome. Like I said this is we're super excited about this new podcast. This is a new chapter for us. This is for fun. And like I said, we're here to support men and women and how we can help you guys. So yeah, this is the new presgraves and

Nicole:

Nicole AF, thank you guys so much

Cindy:

with your Baddies, and okay, I'm learning your Baddies, Boyfriends, Bitches and everything in between. See you next time.

Nicole:

Bye

Cindy:

bye

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